Thank God For Firewhiskey
by Cheez Wizz
Summary: One part James. One part Lily. One part club. 20 parts firewhiskey. Mix vigorously... and your result is a very drunken first date between Lily and James. Pleeease review! ONESHOT!


She looked at the disco-ball admiringly. It was really quite a lovely creature to behold, made all the more desirable by the five shots of firewhiskey she had just downed within a matter of seconds. The ever-powerful disco ball illuminated her pair of rather glittery platform boots, which then bounced the beam of light right in Sirius's eyes, who winced and stumbled drunkenly. Lily giggled so hard she fell off her stool practically without realizing she had done so. James laughed as he pulled her to her feet and almost fell over with her. They were really a mess.

Lily hadn't even wanted to come. She really didn't like James at all. Still. Sirius had begged her so pitifully that she really couldn't say no. She may have hated James, but she wasn't cruel enough to turn down _that_ puppy face, Sirius was famous for it (she would come to realize later that it made perfect sense that he had perfect skills in anything canine). 'What the hell,' she had thought to herself, 'one date with James isn't going to change the rest of my life.' She came only on the condition she could bring her friends. Thank Merlin she did too; she never would've loosened up if they hadn't convinced her to try firewhiskey. Which she immediately loved.

This thought having suddenly occurred to her, she planted a big (crooked) kiss on the side of Carly's head for having given it to her. 'Thank Merlin for firewhiskey. And for Carly making me try it. And for my poodle Ladybug.' Her mind felt really… fuzzy. And wiggly. It was a good feeling. She just noticed that James had helped her back into her stool. That had been rather nice of him.

"That was nather rice of you James-y deary," she said, failing miserably at her attempt to utter a coherent 'thanks.' He beamed as if she had said he was The Grooviest Man in the World. Which she had not. Well, she didn't think she had, who knows. Her mind seemed almost in order, but the things that her mind was thinking weren't really translating very well to her motor and vocal skills. Oh well. She giggled.

James actually looked rather… what was that word? Smashing? Maybe. She had never used that word before, not even in her head. 'Sss-Ma-Shiiing.' She had also never thought of James as being smashing, or whatever word it was she was trying to think of. Maybe it was the disco ball. That thing really made everything seem a bit lovelier. Even Peter was a bit on the smashing side. Lily decided she liked that word.

"Let's dance!" Lily suddenly cried excitedly.

"I love that song. Let's dance… hmm hm, doo do doo do…" Sirius began (almost) singing his favorite Bowie song.

"No. Let's _dance_," Lily showed him what she meant by bobbling her head and making some strange hand gestures. Luckily Sirius seemed to get the point. The whole party reconvened on the dance-floor of Club Stardust, while the best music EVER (in Lily's drunken opinion) played loudly. At first she was dancing by herself to the music. Luckily, the alcohol in her bloodstream didn't seem to impede her incredible dancing skills. It would really have been a disappointment if she had tripped over her huge sparkly boots in front of everyone just because she was drunk. She realized soon enough though that she seemed to have begun dancing with James. 'How did that happen?' Strange things happened when people became drunk.

He turned out actually to be a good dancer, and to everyone's immense relief didn't ruin the date by trying anything sleazy. He just danced playfully, yet still a (bit) on the sexy side. Lily decided she liked the way he danced. She was amazed at herself for realizing two whole things in only one night that were good about James. It had to have been a record. She decided that it wouldn't hurt if she danced _with_ him. She began to dance with him (intentionally this time), and both The Marauders and Lily's friends stopped and watched. This was A Very Important Moment. What if Lily _finally_ gave James a chance after all these years?

James was so elated he could have shouted, but that might have startled Lily. He couldn't possibly risk scaring her off now that she had _finally_ warmed up to him. They simultaneously began to head-bang. It was a sign, to Drunk James, that is. Surprisingly, Lily found this funny too. Maybe it actually wasn't so surprising, really, she was very drunk. Either way, James made a quick thank you to Merlin for the bartender at the club that would sell underage. This date would've been a nightmare without the firewhiskey. James could almost picture in his bleary mind the way Lily would've just been grumpy and uninvolved if they hadn't gotten some liquor in her.

Maybe James wasn't as bad as Lily had always thought. Sure, he was definitely an ass when he was younger, but he seemed to have grown out of that. That first impression of him though seemed to have stuck in her mind, it's hard to get over firs impressions. Now that she had the firewhiskey to loosen her mind up a bit she realized that James had stopped being so horrible a long time ago; it was her mind that had kept him that way for her. Maybe she would consider a second date. Who knows?

James seemed to be considering more than just a second date and seemed to be considering doing it much sooner than Lily had been imagining. He began to pull her off the dance floor though he made sure not to be rough. Lily amazingly realized in her drunken state that his tug was more of a question than a demand… and even more amazing she didn't immediately feel like kicking him in the shins. She followed him off the dance floor in her huge boots while all the Hogwarts' students watched with open mouths as comprehension dawned in the inebriated minds. James was leading Lily outside, probably to a private alley, and everyone (even drunk) knew what that would lead to.

James was so ecstatic but figured that hid drunk vocal chords wouldn't be able to cooperate with his mouth and brain enough to say something very tactful so he just grinned instead. He indeed led her to an alleyway out of view from anyone who might stroll past… perfect. Now if he could simply insure that she wouldn't bolt at the first sign of intimacy…

Lily was actually excited. James was an infamous playboy; he therefore must have been a great kisser. She assumed that they were both drunk; it would just be something funny for them to laugh about in the future. 'Ha ha. Remember that time Lily and James got drunk and snogged like there was no tomorrow?' It would just be a fun story for the future… and a really great snog for the present. She let him lead her to an alleyway that seemed private enough.

James began by leaning her against a wall and kissing her slowly… no tongues yet. 'Must go slow… she might be the type who gets offended at too much too fast,' he thought with an unusual sense of clarity considering his intense urge prodded on by hormones and liquor. He was truly amazed when she slid her tongue along his bottom lip, begging for entry. He immediately obeyed (what 17-year-old boy wouldn't in the midst of the gorgeous and willing girl he had been pursuing since age 12?). He moaned ever so slightly as he finally got what he had been wanting for five years. A heated snog-fest resulted. At seemingly the exact same moment Lily and James realized how terribly inconvenient it was that she was a full head shorter than he, and swiftly dealt with the situation.

James lifted Lily up by the waste and pressed her against the wall as she slid her legs around his middle to insure she didn't slip down. The intensity of the moment seemed to snap them out of their drunken states long enough to be lucid enough to manage this endeavor without even breaking lips. Lily had been correct in her assumptions; James was a phenomenal kisser. The best by far she had ever had the chance to snog. She would have said so too if she hadn't been so busy with her… erm… activities…

Eventually Lily's legs started to become numb. 'Must not break off session… must find inner strength…' unfortunately this inner mantra seemed to fail miserably and her leg spasmed, causing her to let go of James and fall painfully to the ground. She felt like The Sexiest Person In Town… not. Maybe someday she would work off he embarrassment, but for the moment she was having a hard time working herself up to even looking at James. It didn't help that James suddenly started to laugh… most likely at her.

James lifted her up, still laughing. The firewhiskey must have not quite worn off yet, or he probably wouldn't have found this so funny, but unfortunately he did. He hoped Lily wasn't offended by his gales of laughter but he couldn't seem to hold them back. Good Merlin, what a night.

Lily decided it was funny also, even though it was embarrassing. Just another hilarious story to reveal later. As se sat on the ground she began laughing, holding her sequined sides and kicking her glittery-booted feet. If James has been so inclined he probably could've seen up her miniskirt with the way she was waving her legs around, but he decided to be a good guy instead. Even if she never knew it was always better that way. It suddenly occurred to him that if he was indeed a good guy he would help her to her feet and off the wet ground but he was laughing too hard. Instead he just sat down on the ground next to her, at least that way they were on the same level. They sat there and they laughed for longer than they could've imagined about something that didn't seem _that _funny.

As it turned out, Lily was both right and wrong. She was correct in assuming it would be good story to tell. Little had she known when she accepted the date that it would be their child she would plan on telling, she had been so wrong to assume that this one date with James wouldn't change her life forever. Thank Merlin for firewhiskey, and Sirius's puppy face.


End file.
